No One Asked for This: Essays

From writer Cazzie David comes a series of acerbic, darkly funny essays about misanthropy, social media, anxiety, relationships, and growing up in a wildly eccentric family.

For Cazzie David, the world is one big trap door leading to death and despair and social phobia. From shame spirals caused by hookups to panic attacks about being alive and everyone else having to be alive too, David chronicles her life’s most chaotic moments with wit, bleak humor, and a mega-dose of self-awareness.

In No One Asked for This, David provides readers with a singular but ultimately relatable tour through her mind, as she explores existential anxiety, family dynamics, and the utterly modern dilemma of having your breakup displayed on the Internet. With pitch-black humor resonant of her father, comedy legend Larry David, and topics that speak uniquely to generational malaise, No One Asked for This is the perfect companion for when you don’t really want a companion.

Mean sister --
Do not disturb --
Ex dysmorphia --
Almost pretty --
Is everything gonna be fine? --
Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: I --
Why God is definitely real --
Too full to fuck --
So embarrassing --
Love you to death --
Insecurity when you're the new girlfriend --
Environ-mental mom --
Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: II --
Shit-talking etiquette --
My parasite --
Privileged assistant --
I got a cat for my anxiety --
This essay doesn't pass the Bechdel test --
Tweets I would tweet if I weren't morally opposed to Twitter: III --
Moving out --
Erase me --
Thanksgiving

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